Thursday, October 20, 2011

Sad.

Today I am sad. I miss some of my other foster kids who have left.

When I get too sad about it I get kinda mad.

I get mad about how unfair this whole process is. I get mad that not only do we loose "our" kids - they loose us.

I swear, if I was ruler of the universe I would MAKE the bio parents maintain a relationship with the foster family for the child's sake.

I know not every situation should be dealt with that way...but, some should.

I want my kids to be happy WITH THEIR FAMILIES. I want them to know WE DID NOT DECIDE TO GIVE THEM AWAY.

I I I I I.

I guess I have a lot of what I want on my mind today.

I have not had one bit of happiness that had to do with foster care that didn't end in heartbreak.

Foster Care is a sad world to live in.

7 comments:

Cherub Mamma said...

I'm in denial.

My little ones have court on November 7. I know they are going to be court ordered to go to their grandma's.

They don't know this grandma. She lives 6 hours away. She doesn't speak English. (I don't speak Spanish.)

I'm going to be so damn sad when they leave that I'm forcing myself to live in denial right now.

I feel your pain though. I hope your day gets easier.

Mama P said...

Amen, sister. I will agree with that and raise you a "foster parents must be given an update from DHS after each follow up visit so they know you're actually making the follow up visits."

In a perfect DHS system, of course.

Mrs. Bird said...

I'm cycling through all the stages of grief at the moment. Currently in the numb stage...finally blogged about it. And my blogs are opened up again..

aka. Mimi said...

I have those days too. Even when it comes to Booger Bear (and I still see him almost every week!). I'm with CherubMamma in that Monkey's next hearing is next month, and I just have this sinking feeling that they'll be returning him to an unpredictible environment a few months too soon. Nothing I can do about it though.

The "sad days" are rough. I'm sorry. :(

Sunnysideup said...

Saying a prayer for you Mama foster and all you other mamas that posted comments. I know the work you do and the love you put in often goes without reward! I admire everything you ladies do! In your times a grief please don't forget to smile (even if it's only a mental smile,lol) because I cannot even begin to imagine the blessings that you are giving to these children during the time they are in your care. May God bless each of you in your work for Him!

Ruth said...

May I share a good story?!? I sit here having a "party" with my 5 adopted kids. The foster system was horrible, but I am now on the other side. No more visits. No more bio parent drama. No more messed up caseworkers.
The kids are so happy and settled since the adoption. They are really, different kids.
For 3 years I prayed and lived in fear that my kids would be send to bio grandpa. He did everything he was supposed to do. But lied in his paperwork. He had an attorney. Mom contested the adoption. Someone messed up paperwork. What should have been over and done in 6-9 months took 3 years.... It was a major roller coaster ride. The kids reacted terribly. But it's all over and they are mine forever!
I had a total of 12 kids in and out in 3 years. I adopted 5.

Diane said...

Yes, a very sad world. But remember, it would be even sadder without you and others like you. The really good foster parents make a world of difference in the lives of the children that are blessed to meet them. You are doing God's work here on earth, making their lives better, even if only for a while. I couldn't keep doing this if I didn't turn my eyes toward Him when I get sad, mad, frustrated, pissed off, etc. It still hurts, but it works.