Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Renewal.

(an old shot of Lizzy)

Today our licensing worker called to set up a time to come renew our fostering license. After reading everything I did yesterday there is part of me that thinks it would be so much easier to NOT renew. I know that would mean Lizzy would have to be moved, so of course we aren't doing that, but I hate that part of my reason for keeping our license open is the what ifs.

What if Sabrina comes back into care?
(By the way, I texted her mom yesterday and she said that Grandma is home and back to work. That was good to hear.)

What if by some miracle our little girls come back into care in our state?

What if we get "The Call" that is for our next beautiful little person?

Will we ever adopt?

Will we adopt Lizzy?

Will we have the chance to adopt Lizzy?


Fostering is something I would LOVE to do forever...and I also would LOVE to close this chapter of my life and move on. Honestly, I guess I don't know what I want, but I find it interesting that at every moment I have ever been ready to quit God has everything set up so that I have many reasons not to.

I guess HE knows something I don't.

5 comments:

Debbie said...

Yes He does. So glad He is in control.

CherubMamma said...

Some people see God in a beautiful sunrise or sunset. Or maybe in the magnificence of a flower. Or when you hold a new baby.

Me...I HAVE to see Him all over the foster care system. It's so horribly broken so I have to imagine Him holding each of these precious children in His hands and then appointing people like us to do His work.

If I stop seeing God in foster care I'll likely go insane. It's been the perfect life lesson where I've been FORCED to learn to Let Go..and Let God.

Tammy (aka. "Mimi") said...

Ugh... I feel the same way! I want it to be over, but at the same time, I don't! I think what I REALLY want is to be done with foster CARE, but to continue fosterING. I can't have it both ways though, so I guess I'll just keep doing what He tells me. :-)

Endless Love ~ Amazing Grace said...

Yes He does.....His Will:)

Diane said...

I can totally relate! I am also filling out renewal paperwork but am really wondering what is next. With an adoption coming up, can I really still take in more kids? I'm searching for His answer.