Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Adopted.




On August 16th, 2013...Sophie Rae went from being a foster child to being a part of our family.


We are no longer foster parents to any children.  We are just their parents.


I wonder what our next adventure will be?  :)

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Distracted.

Sorry I haven't been around the past few days.  My husband and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary over the weekend and I haven't quite gotten back in the swing of things.  If you are a fan at my "Mama Foster" facebook page you might have read that our adoption of our 7th child THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE ALREADY was delayed because the adoption worker listed the wrong hospital in the space where they asked where the child was born.  I wanted to cry when she called and told me.  I know that is over dramatic and it really is not that big of a deal, but I was hoping that it was DONE.  It is very very close to being done, so I will just have to be patient.


Also, over in facebook land you may have seen a few of these floating around:
I have been having an absolute BLAST making these pictures and sharing them all over facebook.  I want people to see what TREASURES are awaiting them if they take the LEAP of FAITH to come find them!  It you want to see all the pics you can see them here: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=360275907408977&set=a.310456459057589.1073741828.309877699115465&type=1&comment_id=606113&offset=0&total_comments=5

If you want to submit a pic of your adopted child that USED to be a foster child feel free to message it to me over at my facebook page OR email it to me at mamatofoster@gmail.com

In other news, our "super not-so-secret" book is coming right along!  I am so excited for the day that it is finished and ready to launch into the world!  The stories are amazing and it is exactly THE book I was always searching for as I was getting ready to become a foster parent!  I wanted to know what it was REALLY like to foster and this book is exactly that!!!

I hope you all are doing good too.  If you get a chance, leave me a comment and tell me how your foster kiddos are doing!  I miss them! 

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Like Flies.

I went to Sam's club today.  I was by myself (miracle), and I was picking up two things.  Baby wipes and vinegar.

Exciting life I lead.

Anyway, I get in line to pay and the lady ringing me up says, "You look like you have a toddler."

Me:  Yep, I have two of them, actually.

(I decided to spare her the "I actually have seven kids" story)

Cashier:  You know, you can put vinegar in your kid's mouth and it's ok because it's food"

Me:  Uh-huh.

(She was getting at, I guess, that if your child uses a bad word or something you can use vinegar as a punishment like a "I'll wash your mouth out with soap" type of deal)

Cashier:  If you use soap the state will take your kids away, but if your use vinegar they can't.

Me:  Soap is pretty old school.  People used to do that all the time, I guess.

Cashier:  Yeah, one time I even had a social worker at the house, and used vinegar in my kid's mouth.  I told them that it's food.  They can't do anything about it.

Me:  Well, it is in salad dressing....


I trailed off as I grabbed my items and made a run for the door.  I wonder what she would have thought if I would have told her I was a foster parent.  I swear, I attract those kind of people like flies!!!


Monday, August 5, 2013

Adopted.

At this moment I MIGHT be the legal mom of seven children.  I am waiting on a signature from a judge and for papers in the mail to come and tell me that she is mine.

That is the weird part of having no finalization hearing.

With Lizzy's adoption the judge asked me at the last hearing, "Do you want a finalization hearing or do you want me to just hurry up and sign the papers so this is done."

I  told her to do whatever made that child mine the fastest.

She said, "You sound like a woman who likes to get things done.  I like that."

So, a few weeks later, I found out that on a sunny day in June I had become a mother to my adopted daughter without even knowing it.  (Until I got the papers in the mail)

I didn't feel like Lizzy would benefit from a hearing because she thought we already were her family.  She was so young that there was no way to explain the situation to her, and the court house was an hour away and I wasn't in the mood to drive out there...again.

Our 3 kids that we just adopted did have a hearing.  Their judge insisted on it.  Their hearing was also an hour away, but in the opposite direction of Lizzy's.  For my five and six year old, the hearing was a good idea.  They got to hear from the "judge" (that their foster mom was always talking to them about) that they would stay with us forever.  Then all the kids got a sucker from the judge.  It was cute.

In our newest baby's case, yet again, she is too young to know what the hearing is or what is happening.  Quite frankly, I dare you to tell her that I'm not her mom.  :)  I just want hers FINISHED.  I feel like it will be as if the "chains of foster care" will finally be cut from around us and we will be free.

And, for all I know this has already happened.

But, I'm still waiting for the paper in the mail to tell me it has.


(the picture of the rainbow is a shot of the rainbow that showed up the day we signed all the legal papers agreeing to adopt our sib group of three -  a sign of God's promise to us, I am sure)

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Part two.

After the first night that Sabrina spent the night i didnt really have a plan for Saturday.  The kids played all morning and I finally gathered myself and the babies up and took the kids to the park.  Lest i sound like Wonder Woman, my husband came with us as well.
The kids loved the park.  Dark clouds started to roll in and instead of leaving we told the kids we would just hang out under an over hang and wait until it passed.  It ended up raining much longer than we thought it would so we ran to the car and Went home. The kids were drenched so we changed their clothes and hung out at home until dinner time.  We took them to McDonald's and let them play at the playplace.  We got lots of stares.  Apparently eight kids look like a lot.  After that, we went home and the kids jumped on the wet trampoline.  They got soaked again and Sabrina said "I always wanted to jump on a trampoline!"  The day was filled with lots of fun memories and lots of wet clothes.  Sabrina was sure that she wanted to spend the night again so she did.  We had no issue at night.  We put the kids to bed at 11 pm (which is still way too late) and everything went well.
The plan for the next day was to go to church as usual and then go to my mom's house.  It was my mom's birthday.  Sabrina didnt seem to recognize my parents or my husband's parents BUT when my sister arrived at my mom's house Sabrina ran up to her and gave her a big hug.  She hadn't seen her since her last day in our home.  I was surprise, but happy, that she remembered her.
3pm came all too soon and it was time for us to take Sabrina back to her mom's house.  I told my husband that I wanted to be the one to drop her off so I packed up my one year old and Sabrina and drove her home.  My husband took the rest of the kids home.
On the way to Sabrina's house my one year old fell asleep which was nice because Sabrina and I finally had time to talk.  She talked about school (which is going well) and talked about how she worries that her grandmother is going to die (she gets that from her mom, her mom talks about that alot.  Grandma is their only source of income and has gotten sick a few times over the past couples years).  I don't know why I said it, but I told Sabrina that I was glad she gets to live with her mom.  Well, I do know why I said it.  I want her to be with her mom if that is where she wants to be and if it is safe.  She didnt say much so I said, "are you happy to be living with your mom?"  She said, "yes, because I love her and grandma and that is where I belong....but I feel like I belong with you too."

I wasn't expecting that.  It was like everything i feared and hoped for collided.  I want her to be happy.  I want her to be happy living where she has to.  But, I think I wanted to ignore the fact that she loved me as much as I loved her.  There is something there that made my Sabrina bug her mom until after eight months of silence she finally gave in and let me back in her life.  On my end i did nothing.  I never contacted mom.  I waited and prayed and cried.  And then God gave me my first daughter back.


It isn't the way i wanted it, but had God given me what I wanted back then i wouldn't have what I have now.  I still want better for Sabrina than what she is living right now.  But, God has a plan.  I don't have to know all the details in order to trust that HE knows what HE is doing.

Sabrina.

When I went to pick Sabrina up I took my one year old and my 5 year old daughters.  I pulled in the driveway and mom, grandma and sabrina spilled out of the trailer into the driveway like they normally do.  mom and grandma were encouraging sabrina to have fun and spend the night, but both mentioned to me that they weren't sure she would stay the whole night.  they said that she had stayed the night next door to them and said that she claimed she couldn't sleep at all there and was up all night.

i loaded sabrina up and she and my 5 year old played barbies the whole way back to  my house.  when we pulled in the driveway sabrina ran in the house like she had been there a million times.  which, she has, but that was 2 1/2 years ago.  she ran inside.  my husband and son met her and gave her a hug and told her that they were glad she was here.

she ran off with my young tribe of children and played the day away with them.  i have my hands full every day with the babies so between making meals and taking care of kids i didn't have any alone time with sabrina, but she didn't seem to  need any.  she just played with all the kids.

they played with babies, barbies and dress up clothes.  we had pizza for dinner.  it just just normal weekend stuff.  i knew sabrina's mom lets her stay up VERY late so i decided to do the same in hopes that she wouldn't freak out and want to go home at 11 pm.  it worked.  i let all the kids stay up until past midnight (oh my word, i will never do that again if i don't have to) and eventually sabrina asked if it was bed time.  i put the kids in bed and hugged each one good night, said "i love you" and gave them a kiss.  the smile on sabrina's face when it was her turn was priceless.  i left the room and checked on her later and she was out like a light.

i guess this is where i should mention "the bear".  when i picked up sabrina from her mom's house her mom showed me a bear that she packed for her.  she said, "she sleeps with this every night and WILL NOT sleep without it!  if she misplaces it even at home we have to tear the whole house apart looking for it because she HAS to have it.  Please keep an eye on it."  the bear looks like your typical worn out beloved baby bear.  she never had anything that she HAD to sleep with at my house so i found this interesting.  it wasn't until the car ride home that i found out what the deal with the bear was.  sabrina told me that in one of the pictures in the photo albums i made for her to take with her when she was returned to bio mom she was holding that bear in her bedroom at our house.  i have known for a while that she looks at those albums a lot.  well, it turns out that, after seeing that bear and connecting it with our house, she latched onto it and has been obsessed with it ever since returning to her bio mom's house.

This is just one of the things that had me in tears after I dropped her off on Sunday.  I will share more later.  It is 3 am...and I have kids to take care of in the morning.