Anyway, Lizzy's dad that she loves, her bio dad, is for the most part out of the picture. He still calls to check on her and stuff, but anytime she talks to him on the phone or sees him (she saw him probably about a month ago) she becomes very hard to deal with. She becomes mean to us, she acts like we are the bad guys taking her away from him all over again, she gets whinier and is a mess for a week or two after seeing him or talking to him on the phone.
He is not part of this case. He kinda was when he and mom were still together, but now that they are broken up he has nothing to do with this. No visits and basically has no right to any contact with her. Lizzy loves him, he loves her, but he gave up. He wants to stay in contact with her and would like it if after she is adopted I would let him see her once in a while. Considering how she treats us after she sees him, it is hard to want to make that happen anymore, but I do have respect for the relationship she had with him before she ever met me.
That being said, I think she needs some time to let go of the idea that she is ever going back to his house, because she isn't. No matter how this goes she will either stay here with us, be adopted by someone else, or go to her LEGAL dad-the one she doesn't like. There is no scenario in which she will be going to live with him.
The back story is...I am thinking about packing up everything he ever gave her and every picture of him and putting it away for when she is older. He hasn't bought her many things, but she does know exactly what he did buy her and also associates some of the things her mom got her with him as well (I would pack those up too). None of these things are her every day favorite things, she just sees them and it makes her think of him and maybe ask about him. Her mom also gave her pictures of him and she looks at those once in a while too.
She will never be living with him again. She will only see him or have any contact with him if she stays with us...which might or might not happen. I feel like she needs some time to let go of the idea of her going home to "mom and dad" because "mom and dad" don't even live in the same house anymore...the home she remembers doesn't exist any more and even the house that still stands there is not where the court will put her.
So, my question is, what do you think of me packing up her stuff from him? Would you do it, not do it...why or why not? I will be saving it for her for when she is older, but I will not be bringing it out anytime soon.