I got home and for a while it was quiet.
Then, I got a text from Lizzy's mom:
"So, what happened in court?"
"I was told that I cannot let you or legal dad see her or talk to her on the phone or I will get in trouble. They did not reschedule the trial. They went ahead and had it today and basically you don't have to do anything because your part in this is over."
She wrote back:
"Bio dad is right, I am a bad mom."
I wrote back:
"You are not a bad mom. You knew that you couldn't take care of her right now and she needs someone who can."
That was the end of it for that day. When I read my first response to her to my hubby he started laughing. I was like, what? He thought it sounded pretty harsh. I told my sister and she thought it was putting it nicely...I was trying to be nice. I also didn't feel it was my place to say, "Your rights have been terminated", but maybe I should have...I don't know. I also am not really supposed to tell people about what happens to these people in court so I didn't tell her that they terminated legal dad's rights too. I don't know, I just said what I said.
Then Bio Dad calls.
He calls, asks what is going on and I kinda beat around the bush about it. Yet again, not my place PLUS...I don't think it is his business anymore. If he wanted to know what was going on all the time he should have stuck around, don't you think? Anyway, eventually he specifically asked if there was court today and I said yes. Then he told me that bio/legal mom called her aunts who in turn blew up his phone telling him he needed to call the court house because all he had to do was prove paternity and he could get Lizzy back.
I told him that FIRST OF ALL, none of those people, including bio/legal mom, were in court today. THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED because they weren't there and, as we all know, mom wouldn't even "waste her cell phone minutes" in order to see what happened. He then told me the names and phone numbers of the people the Aunts had given him. I told him that I had never heard of one of them and the other one was the social worker that originally had the case THAT ISN'T EVEN A SOCIAL WORKER ANYMORE.
He said, "Oh, that must be why she never calls me back."
I kinda of went on a rant about how he could look into anything he wanted BUT these Aunts were sending him on a wild goose chase that they knew nothing about. He went on a rant, not directed at me, about the system and how nothing is fair...same conversation that we have had like 50 times.
I am over it. I gave them ALL every chance...the chances have run out. I did tell him that the state was "terminating" both of their rights, mom and legal dad. I made it sound like it was in the process (which it has been for months now), I didn't say "They terminated them today".
I am not going to give people (legal or bio family) anymore information on this case. They have spent the last 2 years trying to give this kid to people who are obscure relatives to all of them. I actually ended up telling one of the Aunts that she needed to quit trying to give this kid to strangers just so she can "be with family".
I am SICK of people wanting these kids to stay with "family" so badly that they are willing to rip their lives apart AGAIN...and for what? I just don't understand.
A few days later I got a text from mom:
"Send me some pics of Lizzy"
which I ignored.
The next day I got a text from her that said:
"You can uh sen me some pic of Lizzy"
I texted back:
"Are you asking me or telling me because I can't tell"
She wrote back:
So I sent her a couple old pictures where Lizzy is pretty unidentifiable.
We will see what happens from here. She did say thank you, by the way.