Monday, May 9, 2011

Beautiful.


With every nose I wipe I am thanking God they are still here to wipe.

With every disgruntled scream I thank God my rooms are not filled with empty silence.

With every whine I remind myself they could not be here.

With every need voiced endlessly until it is met I remember I longed for this.

With every crying, kicking fit I remember that they need me.

When my arms are just too full I am so glad they don't ache from emptiness.

When I am overwhelmed I smile because I never feel lonely.

When their behavior is just plain ugly I sit in amazement that God gave me the ability to love the little person with all the ugly behavior.



So often I forget to see the beautiful in all of the ugly that goes on when little hearts have been broken a few too many times and little minds are so confused because life doesn't look the way it is supposed to.

Coming home hasn't been very smooth, but I expected this.

We came home to three sick kids who were all confused from being misplaced last week. Behaviors I hadn't seen in a long time...or ever, are out in full force.

Still, it is go good to see them home-comfortable enough in their two year old way to show me that this is where they belong.

For now at least.


5 comments:

Carrie said...

Great post! Hope you were able to relax while you were gone!

MamaFoster said...

thank you carrie, we really did have a lovely trip and as we work our way back into normal I am remembering just how much it was exactly what I needed to get myself to keep doing what I am doing.

Julie said...

I feel the same way sometimes -- remembering to be grateful in the middle of tantrums, middle of the night wake ups, etc. This really was beautiful.

Learning To Abandon said...

Amen!!
I hope you have a wonderful, calm, week as you helped these 3 young children re-gain the stability you have worked so hard to give them. Way to keep persepctive!

Penelope said...

My prediction is that they won't be moved until mid- summer. The longer they are with you, the less likely to move. Is the judge really that adamant about moving them?