Saturday, March 3, 2012

Yes, I am a bit out of my mind.

I have been a little quiet because I have been thinking about somethings that I am not sure I am ready to put out there yet...but it is foster care related so I guess I will mention it.

Over a year ago we almost adopted a little boy named Joseph. We went through all the paper work and actions to move him from his foster home to our home including having him for several vists at our home including having him for Christmas in 2010.

After our Christmas visit both my husband and I fessed up to each other that we were not sure we wanted to parent him. We felt no connection to him which was odd considering it was not hard for us to fall in love with our foster children instantly. I was the one who brought it up and when my husband echoed my thoughts I knew it was over. We called the next day and pulled out of the adoption.


When we did this the worker on our end gave us a very hard time about it and said "they" (our agency) would probably never offer us another adoptable child and we would probably need to only adopt children we fostered. I told her that I didn't care what they did because I would not be adopting a child I didn't think I should.

Ironically Lizzy's case has been turned over to this worker. I can tell she doesn't harbour any resentment over the last situation like you would think she would. We have talked several times even before she was given Lizzy's case and after seeing three families after decide not to adopt Joseph as well she understood where we were coming from.

Anyway, when we went to meet Joseph for the first time at his foster home we also met his three new foster siblings that his foster mom had taken in. As we walked out the door with Joseph I had the weirdest feeling that I was visiting with the wrong child. I wanted to be taking the new sibling group of three out with us, not Joseph. As we left my husband even turned around and said to the foster mom, "Let us know if they ever come up for adoption.". Which is not very like my husband.

Since deciding not to adopt joseph i have stayed in contact with his old foster mom. He has been adopted, but I continue to keep my relationship with his foster mom. I have listened to her tell stories of how the three are doing all this time. They have been with her this whole time....and now it looks like their case should be going to termination soon.

There is no family to adopt them from what I can tell and their foster mom doesn't adopt anymore...and my hubby and I are wondering what we want to do about all of this if they are available for adoption. When ever we talk about we have a peace...if they do become available we will be sending our homestudy over. If nothing happens nothing happens....and that will be fine too.


And yes, I am scheduled to have a c-section in two weeks to bring our second biological child into the world AND have been filling out adoption paper work for Lizzy.

Thinking about adopting three more would only make sense, right?

19 comments:

Tammy (aka. "Mimi") said...

:-) And THIS is why I love you!

Sophie said...

Yes, it makes perfect sense!! Love the idea and love your heart!

Pam said...

just get a 15 passenger van now, so you have the room for more! If you and your husband have a peace about it then YES it makes sense :) Because God's ways are not our ways, and you live this out.

Kylee said...

Makes sense to me!! ; )

The Author said...

Sounds pretty normal to me!!! ;)

Celticqueen said...

I love it! It does make perfect sense to me. Sometimes you just KNOW. :-)

Our Journey said...

Praying God's will be done and if they are meant to be yours He will see that to fruition!! :)

Felicia said...

Ha, I think that you are asking the wrong crowd! Makes sense to me too. I think that our adopting days are over after our current three are adopted. Our 6 year old was standing there with the 5 and 6 year old girls and complained that there should be 5 little girls. I laughed and told her to go ask her daddy. He survived the question, but just barely.

Debbie said...

I love it! Makes no sense at all to strangers but like minded people here... we understand!
Praying God's best for these siblings.

Mrs. Bird said...

Not crazy at all, but a little bit ;) I've been there...I did a Heart Gallery shoot last summer for a sibling group of three that I seriously wanted to take home. This while I was pregnant and had three kiddos three and under at home. They are still one of my success stories. They got adopted a few months later after their new HG portrait was published :)

Aspiring Foster Mama said...

I totally get it. :)

Diane said...

The more the merrier! All in God's time!

Rebecca said...

Sounds logical to me! Enjoying following you on this journey!

Mama P said...

This just makes me smile.

When you know, you just know. Im Praying for wisdom and peace, and divine, perfect timing.

Pipsylou said...

You do know you're crazy, right? ;)

Mie said...

It makes total sense to mie!

Alison said...

oh my. You are awesome!

CherubMamma said...

I meant to comment on this ages ago...

This post made me smile! And I'm dying to know what's going on with this. When will you know about the termination?

ashley said...

Per your most recent blog, I felt I needed to go back through old posts since I'd obviously missed something...and here it is!

Oh.my.goodness!!! That's a lot of work, however, I have no doubt you two can do it. :-) How old are they? What are their genders?