Wednesday, March 6, 2013


Foster care, Adoption, Life in General is all about timing.

The sib group of 3 (turned 4) had a hearing review Monday.  I heard through the grape vine that our adoption worker got ripped a new one because things weren't as far along as they should be.  (The foster care worker we had when we first got the kids had not filed paper work that NEEDED to be done in order for our adoption worker to file the paper work she needed to, this basically added an additional two months onto our adoption).

So, that was Monday.  Tuesday basically everything came in that she needed for the day before in order for the judge to NOT be annoyed with her.

Gotta love being off by just one day.

The good news is that on Tuesday our adoption took a good two steps towards being done!

It looks like we will be doing the new baby's adoption separately from the other 3, but we may get them all done around the same time.  Hopefully!!!

Now here is the real question.

We are FULL.  Like, basically, OVER full.

Our license will expire in October/November.  Do we keep it open even though we can't take any more?

My gut says yes, but I really do wonder if there is any point.


Robin said...

I would say no. You've done your part, at least the fostering part. Now you need to focus on raising these kids to the best of your ability. And congratulations on your amazing family!

The Campbell's Journey said...

I would say no too. You have so many little ones. We are at the same place you are. Unfortunately our one foster daughter may require us to renew for one more year, praying she will become ours. They won't give us any more placements. I have thought about keeping ours just so I can "easily" babysit for our friends who have foster children. That would be the only reason I would think about keeping it.

Pam said...

ummm.."gut"...or Holy Spirit...?
don't ignore it if it is the second....pray very hard either way...(which I know you do)

StarfishMom said...

yup :) of course!! you're done done until you're dead... Um, ok. Or until GOd makes it quite clear :)

Carol said...
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Anonymous said...

You never know when court will be delayed. You may think that the adoption will happen on a certain date, and as always, things are out of the foster parent's control. So be sure to cover yourself even if you think your adoption will happen before your license renewal date.

Sophie said...

I know you will pray about this. I also know your heart and I say stay open. If another sibling is born you want to be licensed and ready to take him/her. It will kill you to close especially this close to your adoption. I was in the same place and thought I would close. Accidentally our home was closed and when that happened I was so upset that I requested it be reopened and they did. I am now...two years post adoption at a place where I would be okay with closing. Please give yourself some time to process everything that has happened so quickly. Just my humble opinion. :) Love your heart and so happy for your family.

Katelyn said...

Congrats on steps forward! I would be done ;) For now....or the next 10 or so years, lol. But, what do I know. You could go read my last post and see what a great hypocrite I am...

Mama P said...

I don't think just because you have a second thought about closing it or not means the Holy Spirit is telling you to keep it open. I have second thoughts all of the time about finalizing our adoption with the boys, but that does not mean the Holy Spirit is prompting me to realize that they should not have come here and we should send them away for the sake of a peaceful life for the other two children. KWIM?

I think sometimes in the world of foster care, our feelings are that of never being done simply because we know that no matter HOW many children we have cared for, there is always more work to be done. We want to do it.

IF there were to be another sibling, would you take that child at all costs? If there were three or four more siblings? (I once transported a woman who was delivering baby number 11 and had custody of none) IF there were more siblings, would they automatically pass you by because your license was closed? Or would they relicense you as a relative resource?

All THAT said, what would it hurt to keep it open? Nothing. If you want to keep it open, and it isn't a big deal to do it, then go right ahead!

Diane said...

I would keep your license, at least for another year, while everything settles out. You may use it for respite care if not for another placement, or you might need it if another sibling arrives. It is so much easier to renew (even if not planning for a placement) than to jump through hoops later if something changes your mind.

Diane said...

On another note, you mentioned the baby might be adopted separately. You may want to check out the ramifications of this with adoption subsidy. In my state, infants adopted separately are more and more frequently being denied subsidy after adoption if they are healthy without obvious special needs. However, the same infant would be granted subsidy if adopted as a sibling group. I know its not about the money, but you want to make decisions with your eyes open.

Foster Mommy NY said...

Open, open..... ;-)

La Mama Loca said...

I say leave it open! If they give you a choice, I'd leave it open. We had no choice...they closed ours b/c we were already were past capacity in our home with our 5. We wanted to keep it open b/c there were 5 siblings out there that could have come into care at any time.

I wanted a break, but I did not want to close our home for good. The way ours was done left a bad taste in my mouth. We were told we could always open back up if we moved into a bigger home, but then we moved to PR, nor do we plan on going back there to live.

Just b/c you are open doesn't mean you are taking in more just means you are saving yourself the hassle of having to start it all over again, should more siblings come along (assuming you want to take them in).

Me and Jesus said...

keep it... then you wont regret it. People will tell you, you are nuts. lol I have been open for 2 years without a placement (have 5 kiddoes) and I don't regret I stayed open. Now im switching agencies cause I really do want another placement.
I do not plan on telling more then one or two close friends of my plan. most people assume I closed my home. I figure its none of their business.

Deb said...

So glad things are moving forward!!

Was really hoping you'd be able to adopt all 4 at the same time but it really doesn't matter when as long as it gets done.

I'd say keep it open because it doesn't hurt anything to keep it open.

You could do respite in the future or just be available if God brings another surprise.

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